Archive for Newz

God Is A Democrat

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Why else is it expected that Tropical Storm Isaac (most likely to be upgraded to Hurricane shortly) could hit Florida the day the Republican Convention is set to begin? It could be postponed, I don’t want to spoil it, but I could tell you who is gonna win.

Anywho, it got me thinkin’ bout storms.  Did you know that storms are named from lists predetermined by the National Storm Association?  Originally storms were named after saints, then woman exclusively, then in 1979 men’s names were included because they have to put their grubby little hands into everything.  Each year gets one of six lists and these lists are recycled every six years. In the Eastern North Pacific ‘Darby’ will be hurricane #4 in 2016 and 2022 and 2028 and so on bitches!! Names are retired if a storm of that name was particularly brutal. If you are thirsty for knowledge, a nerd or just self-indulgent and want to see if your name has been retired here is the list:  http://www.nhc.noaa.gov/aboutnames_history.shtml

And here are this year’s names:

  • Alberto, Beryl, Chris, Debby, Ernesto, Florence, Gordon, Helene, Isaac, Joyce, Kirk, Leslie, Michael, Nadine, Oscar, Patty, Rafael, Sandy, Tony, Valerie and William (Sorry Yasmine and Zach, no soup for you)

Oh and in case you were wondering what differentiates a tropical storm from a hurricane, why it is 37mph for a TS and 74 for a Hurricane…. as determined by the Saffir-Simpson Hurricane Wind Scale. Remember when you had to go to the library to find out stuff?!

If you think you are witty enough to represent, please share your ideas/posts etc. with darby@thesupersecretproject.com so we can take credit for them.

Darby

Non Sports And Anti Athletes

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We are a bit loosey goosey with the word SPORT, and for that matter the term ATHLETE is also thrown about liberally, no?

To me a sport is something an athlete is good at that very few other people have taken the time and dedication needed to get good at, an act which is impressive and worthy to be the goals of others….. and that to which they achieve should not be stupid.

Shoving 5 grams of snuff up your nose, as cleanly as possible in one minute is not a sport.  Yet is has a world championship:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/07/11/at-world-snuff-championsh_n_1663385.html

5 days ago the a Federal Court of Appeals in Hartford ruled that collegiate cheerleading is NOT a sport, which I support (see stupid clause above) yet there is a Stiletto Race where they refer to the women who sprint in 3 1/2 inch heels…. athletes…..

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/08/08/stiletto-race-video-russia_n_1755986.html?utm_hp_ref=style

and I don’t want to ruin this for you, but Shin Kicking, Worm Charming, Ferret Legging and the WWE are not sports. You need to come up with a different term, your own word… like…. boredanstupidshit.  By the way, Ferret Legging is when multiple people take two upset ferrets and put them in their pants, minus undies (these are FORBIDDEN) and see who lasts the longest without releasing them.  Really?  I hate people.

If you think you are witty enough to represent, please share your ideas/posts etc. with darby@thesupersecretproject.com so we can take credit for them.

Darby

Olympics Thus Far: CliffsNotes Version

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I was away all weekend so I had no idea what was going on in the Olympic world.  I have since caught myself up and here is what I’ve learned:

  • If you’re an athlete who has spent the past who knows how many years of your LIFE doing nothing but train, think and eat for the olympics, forsaking all else for the opportunity to compete…. don’t tweet
  • Diamond grills are frowned upon
  • Bronze medals are fragile and can break if brought into the shower
  • No one likes Michael Phelps anymore
  • The number of fans attending some events are reminiscent of a Marlin’s game
  • And apparently the most memorable video from the Olympics thus far does not involve any athletic ability, unless cringing and willing with facial muscles were a sport:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FaARijCK-kU

If you think you are witty enough to represent, please share your ideas/posts etc. with darby@thesupersecretproject.com so we can take credit for them.

Darby